The moment was almost upon us. After counting down the days, and all the hype, it was now time for the 50th Anniversary special The Day Of The Doctor. I was sat with my unenthusiastic wife Jen, who would rather be watching X Factor. Quarter of an hour to go, trying to wile away the time by browsing my Facebook feed, I learnt that Darren, an old school pal of mine who had moved from oop norf (Manchester) to darn sarf (London), along with his partner Laura, had somehow managed to acquire cheap tickets to watch it in the cinema.
Of course I took the posts personal. Every mention of the Whovians in fancy dress, how he made sure he didn’t sit behind the Sontaran as the massive potato head would obstruct his view. Being offering a jelly baby by a three foot cybermidget.
Consumed with jealousy?
As the clock wound down towards zero hour and my wife Jen sighed and plugged into her ipod?
You bet I was.
I tried to replicate the cinema experience, switching off the light, getting some chocolate, trying to ignore my wife singing along to The Dooleys. But, then, I learnt that
he
was
viewing
in 3D.
In complimentary
stupid glasses.
To pass those final, frustrating minutes before the show aired, I decided to swamp his newsfeed with relevant Doctor images. Just for my own amusement, you know. Maybe the vibration of numerous Facebook notifications would distract from his ogling of a Leela in a loincloth,a Romana in a rah-rah, with a surreptitious glance towards Laura from behind his green and red lenses.
The product of a juvenile mind, I thought that I would share them here with you. I should explain that references such as ‘chips and gravy’, are just a peculiarity of the north-south divide.
Just like your London buses, you wait hours to see a Doctor then five turn up at once.
Great atmosphere here, even Jen is getting into the swing of things
Tenth Doctor:”Cheap tickets, for the southerners, to watch in an obscenely comfortable cinema in 3D?”
Eleventh Doctor:”Yes, while those poor commoners oop norf have to watch it sat on the couch, squabling kids around their feet, wives that would rather watch that X Factor rubbish. We must do something timey wimey and wibbly wobbly.”
“Oi, you Cockneys-take those damn silly glasses off first!”
“I can barely watch, Pond. No gravy. Chips…without gravy.”
“Hello my Cockney Darlings! Time to kick some Dalek arse!”
Darren, when you said you got those tickets cheap, did you bother to read what it actually said on them?
Yes I know. I’m cool in 3D.
Unravel this one, Jeremy Kyle.
No Jen-don’t put your earphones back in. Let me run this by you again…
Darren, you haven’t have you? Laura please check and let us know. Don’t worry, they won’t be in 3D.
This is just up your street Darren. The London eye, I mean, not the erm, you know…
With this last photograph posted, I ran out of time. The programme started, and it was ‘fantastic’, to quote the above Doctor. With the mini episode before it-The Night of The Doctor, both Paul McGann’s and Christopher Eccleston’s Doctor were tied up nicely,providing continuity, and I just love how the ‘new Doctor Who’ acknowledges, references, and celebrates its own history. Has to be important for a show about time travel.
And for a long term fan like me, the surprise appearance, at the end of the episode, of my Doctor, the great Tom Baker, was the icing on the cake.
We only have to wait until Christmas now to see Matt Smith’s regeneration and the new Time Lord on the block.
Darren-what do you mean, you have tickets?
Jen-what do you mean, divorce?
City Jackdaw 