Today, in the Northern hemisphere, it’s the shortest day of the year.
There’ll soon be a hosepipe ban.
Today, in the Northern hemisphere, it’s the shortest day of the year.
There’ll soon be a hosepipe ban.
I’ve just learnt that King Tutankhamen was buried with 145 spare pair of underpants.
Maybe there’s no laundry in the afterlife.
There’s a man on this train, sat in front of me, who is licking his hands like a dog does its paws.
I don’t care that I pre-booked this seat: I’m moving.
A woman on the quiz show, The Chase, said she was a midwife who had delivered 187 babies, and everyone was amazed.
I’m sorry, but when I was a postman I delivered way more letters than that.
Movies provoke unreal expectations. I remember seeing Daryl Hannah in Splash and wanting to take up sea fishing.
I’ve just read about an octopus that, when it wants to mate, rips its penis off and throws it at the female.
Think I’d rather stay single.
I’m not quite fifty yet, but looking back I still can’t figure out why they decided to add Scrappy Doo.
Thank God Facebook is back. I thought I was going to turn fifty in a couple of months without being able to tell everyone that I still feel twenty-one.
Day Two of Calorie Counting Update: Borderline Dead.
So, how’s your Autumn going?